One powerful difference you can make is to eliminate words with absolute meaning from your discussion such as “never” and “always.” Rarely is something "always" this way or "never" that way. When these words are used, it distracts immediately from the issue at hand and directs the discussion to whether the use of always or never is actually accurate. They’re usually inflammatory words in disagreements that are akin to setting a match to a tank of gasoline. Use more accurate words like seldom, frequently, often, rarely for more effective dialogue.